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Who am I

Nov. 2, 1982

I am a normal person. At least that is what I know about myself. 


Basketball: Bowling: Billiards: Badminton: Soccer: Wall Climbing: Swimming: Cycling: Martial Arts: Dancing: Sleeping: Hanging out with Friends: Drinking Beer with Friends: Playing video games: Playing video games with Friends: Malling: Bar Hopping: KTV : Surfing the Internet: Playing Around: Kidding Around: Deep Thinking: Daydreaming:

PS Friends: 

Anne Marii


Bloggy Friends


Other Friends




My past...

July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
January 2007
April 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
June 2008
October 2008
November 2008
February 2009
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
January 2012

layout by qamuri

Saturday, June 30, 2007

What Makes a Good Product?

Is it because of its supreme aesthetic value? Is it because of its ability to satisfy you on the specific thing that you currently need? Is it all of the above or is it none.

Let’s take DOTA for example. The challenge of leveling your character and conquering others in real time play is what interests players the most. The graphics are very good and game style is flexible. It may look easy for an amateur, yet it is highly complicated for the pro. Balance is achieved. The interest is retained… and thus, Dota is one of the most played games here in the country and even abroad.

A point to take into consideration though, I’m not sure that everybody knows this fact. DOTA is actually just a Map version of Warcraft. It is supposed to be an external mini-mission that was developed as an additive to Warcraft 3. It was actually supposed to be nothing but a sideshow. But it was recognized, appreciated… even loved and addicted.

Surprising? Yes… an absolutely astonishing piece of discovery. The game as captured the hearts and minds of hundreds of thousands of players worldwide. Good job! This needs a follow-up question. Was DOTA able to retain the players’ interests? There is no doubt that they did.

They upgraded… they developed patches. Newer versions of the game was created and installed to enhance the game style. Almost every month something, new came up. The ideas of the players as well as their imagination and creativity were further aroused. Because of this, DOTA has been played for more than a year now.

Think about it. A product that was almost considered as trash turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened in the gaming industry.

In light of everything mentioned above, let us see if our abilities of deduction are considerable.

A man is born with a stupid and arrogant father who loves alcohol more than he loves himself. He is so angry at the world and he takes it out on his wife.

This man is born with a mother who loves herself more than her children - an excuse of a woman who is fixated in winning the hearts of her rich neighbors.

But the man grows up to become the owner of a multinational company, earning 8 digits a month. He has a wife whom he loves more than anything in this world. And by God his wife loves him just as well. He has three very happy kids who look up to him as the best father one could ever have.

What makes a good product? What makes a good man?

Is it because of its supreme aesthetic value? Does its history have something to do with it?

Is it because of its ability to satisfy you on the specific thing that you currently need?

Or is it because of the capacity to be recognized and appreciated for the good things that you do… the ability to improve, develop, and be better than ever. To be something/somebody that will capture the hearts and minds of everybody…forever.

You be the judge.

**wala lang… napaisip lang bigla habang nagyoyosi sa labas.

poisoned_____12:20 AM

(0) venomed victims

Friday, June 29, 2007


The smell could sting your nose and make you dizzy. But for me... I liked it. The smell is very familiar. It reminded me of a possible freedom. Freedom from wordly concerns... freedom from pain.

While breathing in, I was taken back to my highschool days. I was so carefree and happy-go-lucky back then. If I encountered something harsh, something emotional, I would just need to slip into another world and play with my mind. The feeling is indeed familiar...I felt I'm about to be high.

But of course, now I know better. I know better than to succumb into that temporary freedom. I know that if you keep inhaling this fuming substance, it actually destroys your mind as well as your body. I know that I should keep away from this stuff and stay healthy.

Just remeniscing the time that I was another person. The smell reminded me. That addictive scent.

"Bossing guard, pwedeng pakisabi na tanggalin yung amoy ng pintura chaka thinner sa elevator? Baka may ma-adik... joke"

poisoned_____1:16 AM

(0) venomed victims

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Wow... I'm the worst Possible Person Ever ;P

If you go over 45, you're a bad influence. If you go under 10, chances are live under a rock and have no life... even more harsh. Total the number of things in each list you've done.

1. smoked
2. consumed alcohol
3. slept with someone of the opposite sex
4. slept with someone of the same sex
5. kissed someone of the same sex
6. had sex
7. had someone in your room other than family
8. watched porn
9. bought porn
10. done drugs


1. taken painkillers
2. taken someone else's prescription medicine
3. lied to your parents.
4. lied to a friend.
5. snuck out of the house
6. done something illegal
7. cut yourself.
8. hurt someone.
9. wished someone to die
10. seen someone die


1. missed curfew
2. stayed out all night
3. eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself
4. been to a therapist
5. been to rehab
6. dyed your hair
7. received a ticket.
8. been in an accident
9. been to a club
10. been to a bar


1. been to a wild party
2. seen the Mardi Gras
3. drank more than four beers in a night
4. had a spring break in Florida
5. sniffed anything
6. wore black nail polish
7. wore arm bands
8. wore t-shirts with band names.
9. listened to rap
10. owned a 50 Cent CD


1. dressed Gothic
2. dressed prep
3. dressed punk
4. dressed grunge
5. stole something
6. been too drunk to remember anything
7. blacked out
8. fainted
9. had a tatoo


1. snuck into someone else's room
2. had a crush on your friend
3. been to a concert
4. dry-humped someone
5. been called a cunt
6. called someone a cunt
7. installed speakers in your car
8. broken a mirror
9. showered at someone of the opposites sex's house
10. brushed your teeth with someone elses toothbrush


1. consider/considered Ludacris your favorite rapper
2. seen an R-rated movie in theater
3. cruised the mall
4. skipped school
5. had surgery
6. had an injury
7. gone to court.
8. walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping
9. caught something on fire
10. lied about your age


1. owned/rented an apartment
2. broke the law in the police's presence
3. made out with someone who had a gf/bf
4. got in trouble with the police
5. talked to a stranger
6. hugged a stranger
7. kissed a stranger
8. rode in the car with a stranger
9. been harassed
10. been verbally harassed


1. met face-to-face with someone you met online
2. stayed online for 5 hours straight
3. talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight
4. watched TV for 5 hours straight
5. been to a fair
6. been called a bad influence
7. drink and drive
8. prank-called someone
9. laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex
10. cheated on a test

Total: 10

Grand Total: 83

-If You Have Less Then 10, write [Im A Goody Good]
-If You Have More Than 10, write [im still a goody good]
-If You Have more Than 20, write [im average]
-If You Have More Than 30, write [im a bad kid]
-If You have more than 40, write [im a very bad influence]
-If You Have more than 50, write [wow, im the worst possible person ever]

poisoned_____1:54 AM

(0) venomed victims

Thursday, June 21, 2007

June 21

Marks a very special day for me. It is also a very special day for a very important person in my life. She's the person I thought I would never have. Sweet, thoughtful, understanding, kind, compassionate, trustworthy, pretty, sexy and loving: these are but some of her traits.

I used to think before that I was unlucky. I used to think that I could never meet somebody who could appreciate who I am and what I am. And then she comes into my life and I have never been happier.

June 21 marks a very special day ... not only for me but for my loved one as well. This is a day that I am forever thankful to God that He created her. She touched the lives of many... and that includes my own. She's a treasure that I was so lucky to find. She's the love that I am so priveleged to have.

Candice Marie Kathleen Garcia... Happy Happy Birthday. May you have many more to come. I love you very very much...

poisoned_____5:29 AM

(0) venomed victims

Monday, June 18, 2007

Open letter to the "Problematics"

Dear Person,

So you think you have the biggest problems in the world. But you should be happy with your current situation. You think your issue needs so much attention and you look for assistance and advice... What's the use of it all if you don't listen? You say you understand and you blame genetics by saying this is "Who I am"; but the real problem is the attitude that you're geared towards to when it comes to life.

Don't be too smart... you'll lose interest in the finer points of life. You'll be insensitive and unappreciative of the little things that still make people happy.

Don't be too dumb... you won't live another day.

Don't be too sensitive... people will tend to stay away. Nobody likes a doormat and nobody likes a friend with issues that much.

Don't be too numb... you won't have the capacity to feel the pain of others and reach out.

Sometimes, it's better to keep some things to yourself. If you have a problem, try to resolve it on your own. If you take advice from others, appreciate it, accept it. Acknowledge it! You don't need to put into action but take from what you feel you need the most.

Just think about this. Other people have the danger of losing their homes. Have you experienced that? Some people fear that they won't live another day. Do you feel the same? Some people will always have greater issues in life compared to you. So don't be so indulged with yourself. Sometimes I wish that you'ld feel a "real" problem. Something that would rumble that quiet brain of yours. Something that would keep you awake at night and zombie-like in the morning. If that happens... then you know there actually is a problem. My guess is you'ld change... you'ld grow.

This is an open letter to some people I know. To the people who think they have a problem but still live a happy life, I hope this entry get's you like a dagger piercing through your heart. To the people I know who have "real" problems... welcome to club. I have a rather large heart and a very open mind. I'll beer with you anytime. :P

poisoned_____9:10 AM

(0) venomed victims

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Simply one of the best

There's nothing like spending a day of full pampering together with the love of your life. After work, me and my super sweet and sexy love stayed at the Holiday Inn in Galeria. We stayed at an upgraded room with a king bed.

The room was nice, spacious and cozy. The bath tub was big enough for the both of us and the room has a "sort of" city view. I did three and a half turns on the bed before I fell, that was how big it was. Overall, we liked our room.

The hotel was situated at walking distance from Robinson's galleria, we ate at burgoo for dinner and we went out of the hotel to smoke. That was when we found out that there was a newly built TGIFridays right beside the hotel entrance and at the back part of the mall. If only we knew, we would have eaten there instead.

The best part of the day was simply lying down on the bed, hugging my baby tight and knowing that that the person I'm holding now is the most important part of my life. My worldly concerns and problems seem to be forgotten and I am enveloped in bliss. Nothing else matters ... only her. This made me come to a realization that I really want to spend the rest of my life, loving my future wife.

*** Pictures yet to be uploaded *** :P

poisoned_____7:06 AM

(0) venomed victims

Friday, June 08, 2007

My future wife

No this not a poem or an inspirational piece dedicated to the "reason" of my life. At least not just yet.... this will serve as an apology and probably a weak explanation ...

Sometimes, I wake up in the morning and I try to see if it's okay. Sometimes I get disappointed... not because of having you in life but because of the other stuff. It's so overwhelming and I have to apologize on this... I do feel depressed. After all I'm only human... and my instinct dictates me at times to dwell on that feeling for quite a while. But this does not mean that you are the reason that I'm sad or that I feel alone. This also does not mean that there is a problem or I personally have a problem with you... it's so untrue... It's just that I feel what I feel at certain times of the day and it retains in me. I have to let it out and writing is how I express it. It's my outlet. It's how I manage to get bye.

So please don't think that I am unhappy sometimes and that I still feel alone even if I have you. External factors affect me too.

Please do not get affected with some of my writings because it's only a part of what I entirely feel as a person.

Because mostly I'm happy ... happy that I have you in my life... happy that I am still alive to feel such wonderful affection and care from the person I truly love. Happy and lucky that you love me as much as I love you.

You're one of the main reasons that I still continue to live... that I still continue to flash a real smile... even though I find it so hard to do so. You keep me going on and for that I can't thank you enough.

I'm very happy that I am receiving so much love and I do intend to spend the rest of my life with you.

If I offended you in any way, I'm so sorry. If I've been insensitive again, please forgive me. If I hurt you so much... know that everytime I couldn't forgive myself for it. Even if it's unintentional... I'm sorry...

You're my life now... and nobody else's... I choose to be with you... for the rest of my life.

poisoned_____12:14 AM

(0) venomed victims

Thursday, June 07, 2007

The story of the Previous Post

I'm gonna be very direct to the point on this. My previous entry entitled Ghost is a creative piece I wrote three years ago. If I remember correctly that time, I just finished watching "GHOST" on HBO... you know... starring Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore? So there... it was never tied up to my Past whatsoever... I noticed some people tying my last entry to my PAST which I do believe if you think about it, pwedeng tumugma diba? I have to enforce once again that it was never about my past. I was just putting myself in the shoes of a Ghost and was wondering what I would say.

No offense... no hard feelings... but let's all please stop talking about it. Enough of that.

Previous post deleted.



I wake up … on a dark and cloudy morning. The room is silent, and even the spinning of the fan creates a muted sound. My brother went to school already, his distorted bed signifying his presence. The quietness is overwhelming. As I stare into the gray sky from the window, I get this familiar feeling… the setting of the sea. It’s an unrestricted, independent and yet unhappy version of tranquility.

I went out of my room and walked passed the hallway. It seems like darkness is swallowing the light at the end of the way. It seems like it’s covering the noise that I yearn to here as well. I wanted to hear voices… people conversing… the TV on HBO or at least the radio playing my kind of music. I reached the dining area and hoped that I could see a smiling face. None. TV is switched off. No lights, no radio… no nothing. The house is enveloped in silence. Only then did I realize that nobody is around. Everybody is out. I cooked my own food, prepared my things and started off to the office. I left the dead place in hope of finding what badly missed.

As I entered the office, everybody was minding its own business. It’s a busy day I presume. Nobody bothered to go out of his or her way to say hi. At least the silence is broken so I said to myself. But as I sat and did my work, I noticed that something is still missing. Even though I had a lot of company, a void is still present in my surroundings. It’s as if the bridge that connects me to other states has fallen down. There is no access to the other end. I can’t seem to find any other way to reach out. And so this emptiness once again fills me. In this area of chitchats and multitudes of conversions, I am still, in all senses,

… … … alone… … …

poisoned_____3:45 PM

(0) venomed victims


I love you. I just like to say that first. I don’t need to add any decorations to those words because love needs none of those. I love you in its truest form. You have been so dear to me as I am to you. You are a part of me now. Separation means I have to forgo my very own life. You complete me… I will never be able to live my life without you. I don’t need anybody else, only you.

I have done everything I can for you. I have been a shoulder for you to lean on, a body for you to embrace in a cold night, a happy face to brighten up your day, and a hand that would serve you however you may please. I was there whenever you needed me. I gave everything I could for you. I sacrificed a lot of what I have or what I could have had for you. But don’t get me wrong… I’m not sad; I’m not regretting any of it. In fact, I’m really happy I was able to support you with the best of my resources and abilities. Just the thought of you being happy is already heaven for me.

Right now, my heart is filled with both joy and sadness. I feel happy because memories of our lives together remain in my heart and soul. All of the world’s pain is gone and only the happy thoughts are there for me to treasure and cherish forever. At the same time, I will be sad for I will never be able to touch your face again. I will never be there to wipe your tears when times are hard. I will not be there to hug you when you feel down.

But know this. In times that you are lonely, sad and blue. Go out and gaze at the night. Stare at the stars because I will be there, and I will come to your need. If you feel a warm breeze followed by a trail of happy thoughts; that would be me, sharing with you all the happiness and joy of our times together. My treasures are still yours to keep.

And so, as I slowly fade into the night and go on my way to the stars, please keep in mind that I have never left you. I will be all around you. I will be inside you – in your heart. Please stay happy, and don’t forget that I love you. I will be with you… within you… forever.

poisoned_____1:28 AM

(0) venomed victims

Monday, June 04, 2007

Emotional Twister in Seconds

You wake up and you catch a glimpse of your phone lighting up and starting to sound its alarm. You angrily pick it up and turn it off before it gives off a shrill sound of warning. Temper builds up as you suddenly realize that you have to go to work and yet everybody is still asleep. Pressure rises as you try to get off from bed and your apathetic face turns to a look of angry despair and your short silent breaths start to grunt.

But then, you are stopped by a familiar touch. A presence beside you stops the bottled up feelings of anger. The love of your life holds you close and you gives off a sigh ... and a sweet smile. Your heart raises but not of anxiousness but of rejoicing. Your spirit is calmed for you are beside the only important person in your existence. You give that person a slight hug and long passionate kiss and you forget your previous emotion as you cuddle a little… for a few minutes… for a few seconds even. God, you would wish time could stop and you’ld get caught up in this bliss.

Unfortunately, it does not. You have a mission to do. It requires your survival. Life requires you to toil in order to put food on the table. It requires you to sacrifice in order to have one more day… and another… and yet another. Why did Adam and Eve have to take a bite off of that demonic apple. Why do we need to suffer labor? It’s so unfair… it’s so rudely unjust! You stand up and try your best to get ready for this day. You forcibly try to wash yourself and dress up with a heart filled with a short despair and a cry of hope that this day does not end miserably.

The emotional twister continues… at a different place… in a different time…

Life goes on.

poisoned_____7:39 AM

(0) venomed victims

Friday, June 01, 2007


poisoned_____5:36 AM