In your life you'll make note of a lot of people. One's with whom you shared something special with, one's who will always mean something. There's the one you first kissed, the one you first lost your virginity to, the one you put on the pedestal, the one you're with... and the one that got away.

Who is the one that got away? I guess it's the person with whom everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn't fall in the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being able to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance. How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn't matter who you're with, it just doesn't work. Small problems become big, inconsequentials become deal-breakers simply because, you're not ready and it shows. It's not that you and the person you're with are no good; it's just that it's not yet right, and little things become the flash point of that fact.

Then one day, you're ready. You really are. And when this happens you'll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance ever have burned in your life. But it'll work because you are ready. It'll work because it's the right time. And you'll make it work... and it'll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you're finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a very different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want, and you've become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there's no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you're single, but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be marriend with three kids, it doesn't matter. All you know is that you've changed, and for some reason, the one that got away is the first person you think about.

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You'll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That's what the one that got away is. It's the biggest "What if" in you life.

If you're married, you'll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think you're marriage is, this could happen to the best of us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're already with the one you're with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure you'll think about him/her every so often but it's alright. It's never nice to live with a "might have been" but it happens.

Maybe the one who got away is the one who is married. In which case, it's the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future, when you're old and gray and remeniscing.

** The last part is edited out to suit my decision in life today **

** This came from an email I had long ago, stored it in my hard drive, probably in anticipation of what could happen. **

** To the one that got away, I understand... in time we could still be friends**